A Bro's Guide To Taking The Ultimate Gym Selfie

Ok Brah, I'm going to lay down some top secret intel and you're going to pick it up like a loaded barbell when no one is looking (not really do it and pretend you did) - if for no other reason than because I said so.  We all know that we don't lift for health and fitness.  We lift to look good, get chicks and post everything we do in the gym to our facebook page.  So if you're new to the bro-life, I will tell you how to take that perfect gym selfie - guaranteed to get you tons of chicks - well, they might click "like" on Facebook - but that counts too.

#1.  Avoid sweating at all costs
Sweating while taking your gym selfie will ruin the picture.  We don't want any strange glare shining on our forehead or enhancing any blemishes we have.  So before snapping that selfie in the squat rack with 4 plates on it, be sure to walk around for a good 15 minutes, checking out the scenery, head nodding to everyone you don't know and prepare yourself for the selfie.

#2.  Be The Bigger Man
Nothing can ruin a perfect gym selfie like taking it with a bigger dude in the background.  So be sure to strategically find the smallest looking dude in the gym and get him in the background of your selfie. You'll just look that much bigger when you Tweet it to your 4 followers.

#3.  Use Photo Filters
Strategic use of photo filters can make your abs look more defined than they actually are and make your muscles look more defined than they ever will be...But that's Ok because we're only focused on the finished product that will grace the pages of our social media profiles and get us the most likes.  So snap that selfie and 

#4. The Duck Face
This is a very essential part of a good selfie. If you forget this element your risk having your face look fat and even a double chin. How are you supposed to impress the ladies if it looks like your neck fat is going to slap the sides of your head.

#5. Find the Best Lighting
Make sure that you are not taking a selfie in a dark corner. There are a few reasons for this. First, in a corner no one will be able to see you. How are other the tiny people in the gym supposed to admire you if you are hiding. Second, poor lighting will give you nasty shadows. bags under your eyes, your abs will disappear and you will just look horrible. You need bright lighting, and people gather around light.

#6. Take as Many Pictures As Possible
If you don't take at least 20 pics you risk not looking your best. You need to give yourself the most options to choose from. How are you supposed to look the most jacked if you only have 5 pictures to choose from. A good side effect of this is you will have hundreds of pictures to show others. People will love to see your progress. It will allow you show how much your pythons have grown over the last 8 weeks. I mean they have gotten at least 2" bigger and now you have proof.

There are no ladies in the men's locker room. Enough said. You think any honeys saw these guys looking their best?? The answer is no. Don't make this mistake.

#8. If Possible Bring a Selfie Stick
Having a selfie stick with you will give you the best angles. Having shots with a down angle will make you look yolked as hell.

Follow these rules if you want to call yourself a real bro, otherwise you are nothing but a poser.